Posts Tagged ‘terrible towel’

Share in camaraderie, share in shame

November 18, 2009

Today, the Detroit Free Press is reporting that two local men (Birmingham residents, to be exact) have begun marketing “The Official We ARE Terrible Towel: A Detroit Original Since 1957.”

The idea is to provide a comic alternative to the Pittsburgh Steelers’ omnipresent terrible towel, which has been a┬ásymbol of success for the Steelers for the last 34 years. Fans at Heinz Field wave the towels in a frantic manner. Fans of other teams are seemingly universally irritated by this conduct. A great tradition indeed.


The original



The towel’s creators, Gordon Miller and John Crick, are even making the bold sales move of the year by attempting to market their invention against one of Ford Field’s staple symbols: the almighty bag.

“It’s hard to eat a hot dog or drink a soda with a bag over your head,” Miller said in a news release. “With the official We ARE Terrible Towel, you can eat, drink, boo and still wave your towel.”


In danger of becoming obsolete, or, at the very least, not trendy?

Can’t say I disagree with Miller here. I’ve never been the towel-waving type, but I’ve ALWAYS been an over-salted, overpriced stadium food type (in moderation, of course) and as a result, an alternative to a meticulously illustrated brown paper shopping bag is a welcome change.

The timing for the mass release of these $10 towels of shame is extremely apropos, as the Lions (1-8) set to do battle with one of the NFL’s three other 1-8 teams, the Cleveland Browns.

So go out and get the new ‘terrible towel.’ Or don’t. But just remember, if the Lions can’t topple the Browns in an epic clash of NFL bottom dwellers on Sunday, at the very least, you’ll need a good box of tissues to dry your eyes after you come to the indisputable realization that the Lions are, once again, the single worst team in the NFL.

Stay tuned for my preview of “Awful Bowl ’09: The Road to 2 goes through Motown” in advance of Sunday’s game.